When you choose your life partner, you go into it with eyes wide open. You know who and what you are at that moment, but the truth is over time you will both grow and change. Sometimes you grow in a way that compliments each other so beautifully, and others you grow in a way that means you need to put in a little extra work. Every relationship needs to be tended to; it is never enough just to leave it to languish. If you want something to grow, you water it, you feed it, and you trim the hindrances. So, what can you do to keep your marriage in a healthy state?
Take a walk. Walking in general if an excellent habit to get into, you don’t have to walk far to feel the effects either. A walk every day will lower your blood pressure, reduce symptoms of depression, and take you out of your usual environment. So take your spouse with you, and you can both reap the rewards. Psychologically, walking in the same direction signals that you are on the same journey together and doing this every day can help reaffirm that for you both.
Make notes. This might sound a little strange but make notes on your relationship – but here is the catch, nothing negative. Every time your spouse does something sweet for you make a note of it. Does he bring you a cup of tea every morning? Filled your gas tank without you needing to ask or mention it. It is those little things that are so important, those touches in which your partner is taking care of you. Once in a while make sure you are acknowledging and saying thank you. Sometimes, one or both of you might begin to become a little resentful if we think we are taking care of the other without it being noticed. And it might sound petty but the thank you and acknowledgment are important. So, write down your daily blessings, and then share them with your spouse at random points.
Science is supporting your need for Rom-Coms. Watching movies about relationships, then talking about the film concerning relationships is highly effective in reducing the need to call the divorce lawyer in. Watching and then talking about these movies is great for limiting how much marriage therapy a couple might need too. It doesn’t matter what the film is about, as long as it is pretty light and it opens up the discussion on your relationship.
A Hug and a Kiss. Two straightforward things, hug for at least 2 minutes per day and kiss for at least 30 seconds. If you are already doing way more than that, you probably don’t need this advice at all! But, to get a big healthy dose of those happy love hormones like Oxytocin, touch is a top up button. More extended hugs and kisses lead to a more profound sense of connection – don’t get the egg timer out, but do consciously try and make the moments last longer.