You are the final arbiter. What does this mean? Surely that’s quite an intense way to start a blog meant to be read by actual human beings? Indulge us with a little patience on your end, and you may realize the benefit of keeping this sentence in your mind. An arbiter is considered a person with the power to dispute things, to judge the appropriateness of a situation towards an intended result. But what does that mean for you? Well, as the final arbiter, you are free to decide who you want to be, the opinions you’ll accept and the opinions you hold. Learning from others is always wise, and can help us all, but ultimately, you will need to be the one to do that. Basically, acting as a final arbiter is saying that with your best efforts to grow, you trust yourself to do the right thing. It is the ultimate form of personal self-reliance.


You’ll realise this need for self-reliance and perseverance when encountering difficulty. You may be splitting up from your partner after years, using expert divorce solicitors to help mitigate the situation as positively as possible. You may have lost your long-term job. You may even be facing something tougher than this. It’s in this moment that you realize, you can never truly and fully rely on anyone else in adulthood. This is not a bad thing, nor does it denigrate other people. In fact, it’s tremendously freeing if you do think this. There may be people that you can surely trust deeply, but knowing that calibrating your self-reliance well should always be the main goal can help prevent you from becoming dependent. However, you’ll need to keep the following attitudes in mind to make the most of this newfound attitude. Doing so could change your life for the better, especially those who struggle with self-confidence in general.


Realizing you’re a great person, a powerful woman with plenty of potential is the first step. This helps you stay on top of your daily responsibilities and start taking pride in the little victories you achieve. The next step is the ability to connect with other people, to be able to bring the best of yourself to your personal duties, which will often translate to meeting positive people, and surrounding yourself with people you truly admire. This can help prevent you feeling alone in a crowd, which many people do in order to prevent that feeling of isolation. A cure for this is to realize the strength of knowing who you are alone, without having to depend on others entirely. Time for introspection and self-development is never time wasted.


The final method of being the final arbiter of your life is to stay humble and grateful. Care for the positives in your life. People often feel being their own authority is cause for them to criticise everything, to only listen to themselves, and to take matters too far in this direction. In reality, we all have plenty to be grateful for. Being appreciative, seeing the good in other people and learning to forgive will help you trust yourself more, and generally help you live a longer and more fulfilling life. There is not weakness in this, but vast strength.

With this humble advice, being the final arbiter and respecting yourself fully will surely come organically.