It’s not easy sharing your parenting duties with your ex after divorce. Whether it’s joint custody agreements, scheduling, creating a good strategy, or communication, have a look at these tips to help to co-parent easier.
Acknowledge Each Other’s Concerns
It’s important for you to listen to the concerns of the other parent, especially when it comes to your children acting out or needing help dealing with the divorce. Think about the ways you can make it easier for everyone, at the end of the day you, your ex, and your children are all bound to have concerns, and the only way to deal with them is to validate them.
Think About Quality Time
Ok, so it’s bound ot be difficult to suddenly be spending less time with your children, however, neither of you have lost the relationship with your children, and it certainly isn’t based on the number of hours you spend with them. Try not to get too hung up on a fifty-fifty split and try to work out a schedule to suit everyone. It’s definitely quality over quantity. If schedules change it’s also possible to file for a Divorce Decree Modification so you can alter any official arrangements.
The best co-parenting relationships allow for flexibility and will understand that at times, things are out of the control of the other. Think about things like needing to stay later at work, or the car breaking down, or football practice for your children has moved times but you can’t make it. Being flexible will mean that your children are looked after and not losing out because they are in a co-parent household.
Learn To Cope With The Loneliness
Although the time away from your children can be excruciatingly painful and you should absolutely allow yourself time to grieve this absence, you should over time try to fill the time with things that make you happy. This way you can be the happiest and best parent possible for your children. Whether it’s seeing your friends, trying new hobbies, getting some rest, or exercise, do something you enjoy. Rather than crash in on the time they spend with the other parent, try to be flexible with each other, if one of you can pick the other from school but the kids are due to stay at the other parent’s house, pick them up and take them to their other home and don’t make a big deal about it.
Be Freinds With Their New Partner
There is no point at all in hating the new partner of your ex, especially when there are kids involved. You want them to be in a happy environment, and if they hear or sense that you don’t like someone they are inevitably going to be spending time with it can impact their own judgment. Why would you want to make things awkward anyway? The most successful co-parenting teams, get along with the new partners because it is important for the children to see this.
These are just a few of the ways you can make co-parenting after divorce easier. Do you co-parent with an ex? How do you make it work successfully?